Turn of Phrase...

We’ve all heard the saying:  “Stick and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me.”  And we all have been hurt by the various names we’ve been called.  Words are very very powerful and when they shift their meaning or become something we’re not expecting…what then?  Gay used to mean happy (and still does, I’m sure, in certain circles).  Still I can’t listen to the lyrics “don we now our gay apparel” and not think of mesh shirts and tight rainbow shorts.  But, you know, that’s on me.  It’s not on the lyricist, it’s not on who’s speaking – that’s on me and I’ll own it.

I tell the story of the time I came into the tail end of (ha!) of the Westminster dog show (or some such show) and the final dog had won.  The reporter is then interviewing a judge who stands there saying:  “Well, you know, she’s one of the finest bitches we’ve had to date.  I mean an all out perfect bitch.  Just wonderful.  Now I’ve seen a number of bitches who haven’t measured up to her…”  And she went on to say bitch about 400 more times and I’m laughing so hard tears are coming out of my eyes.  Again, I fully admit, that’s all on me.  ALL ON ME.  It’s not her doing.  She’s speaking the Queen’s English and I’m wallowing around in the mire of Jethro’s slang.

Words.  Words.  Words.  You see quotes about words, too.  Much like the above with “sticks and stones.”  These quotes (or memes) are found on Facebook and are meant to hit us square between the eyes and fill our hearts.  But I want to take away just the concept of words for a moment and look, instead, at phrasing.

It’s one thing to say the word “love.”  It’s a nice word.  Good.  Four letters.  Two consonants, two vowels, well balanced.  But put that word into the phrase:  “I love you.”  It takes on whole new meaning.  Expand that out to “I love you…as a friend.”  It takes on a nearly opposite meaning.  So as important as individual words are – I challenge you dear reader to look instead not at the word – but at the phrasing behind it.  Take the word love and add a few words around it and what have you got…?  Really.

Miriam, my lovely wife, has a great way of phrasing things (to her – not to me).  There are things called conversations – we have them all the time.  Then there are things called arguments – which we have rarely.  Often times, though (note the word often there), in a fit of a bit of anger – Miriam will say:  “You always do---- .”  Or  “You never do---- .”  And this stops me.  Now it may very well be that I always dump the trash but never put the other garbage bins into the main trash (like I should) but when you’re in the throes of an argument and someone uses words like “always” or “never” – it immediately makes me pause.  I think to myself:  “Do I ALWAYS do that?”  “Do I NEVER do that?”  It’s very rare that you ALWAYS do something or that you NEVER do something – but by using this certain phrasing I’m checked out.  I’m in another world.  I’m thinking about that instead of the person who is pointing their finger at me and the soap soaked sponge that I “never rinse out” or the glasses in the dishwasher that I “always put in wrong.” (You see, above I wrote “often times” – didn’t  say EVERY time or...)

Does Miriam have a point?  She may very well have…but by now the point is now being lost because I’ve become defensive and am not listening.  So try these two different phrases:  “When you take out the kitchen garbage, go ahead and dump the other garbages in there, too – that way you can do it all in one trip.”  Or:  “You NEVER put the other garabages in the kitchen garbage!  Why do you ALWAYS forget to do that?!”  Which one is better?  Certainly they both get their points across but...in one I’m immediately defensive and have checked out mentally while the other I may be more aware or more open...or I may just forget and never do it or always forget or whatever...

The words “Calm” and “Down” are pretty good words.  Both four letters, but there’s a skew in terms of the vowel v. consonant ratio.  Still, separately they’re just fine.  But...put them together?  Early on in my relationship with Miriam, and this may have happen pre marriage but I distinctly remember telling her to calm down and she told me to “never ever tell her to calm down again.”  I think those words have exited from my vocabulary.

Often, though, it’s the word you choose that make a true difference.  Of course this is obvious but I’m not talking about saying “I love pizza” v. “I like pizza.”  I’m talk about buzz words, hot button words, words that have more depth – history – gravitas to them.

At one point when I worked at Heller, my team and I got really good at figuring out when the free lunches came available (see previous blog about the free lunches).  It got to the point where we had secretaries (who often ordered the lunches) giving us a “heads up.”  “Hey, Matt, it’s a litigation attorneys meeting today – I ordered pasta.”  “Cool.”  I would respond and then get the word out to my staff and we’d be on high alert for 1 or 1:15 when the lunch would be over.  But, as I wrote in the previous blog, the office services manager was having a BIG issue with us – couple this with the fact that the receptionist was lying to her that we were running back and forth between conference rooms – balancing four plates piled high while ingesting foot long sandwiches in one bite – she had her eye on us.  But it went beyond that.  She started talking to secretaries about us.  She was undercutting our network of lunch moles who were happy to give us a heads up.  And she was pissed.

Here’s the thing, though.  We abided by every rule and regulation that was put before us.  Yes, we love our free lunch – but we’re not stupid – and I knew my staff and I knew they abided by the rules.  But that wasn’t good enough for her.  She was CERTAIN that we were still stalking and gorging.  Of course HR had to be brought in and a finger was wagged in our general direction and we, once again, said it wouldn’t happen again – and it wasn’t happening anyway...

Then I realized something.  I realized that we were be harassed by the Office Services manager.  The fact that she was creating a “new set of rules” for us and going after our friends and secretaries to stop talking to us (one secretary told us she came to her and told her “stop talking to the records department about lunches”).  When I approached Human Resources and used the word harassed instead of “bothered” or “bugged” or “annoyed” – that perked up HR’s ears.  It’s one thing to bug someone – it’s another thing to harass someone and, my mouth to God’s ear, we were being harassed for really no reason.

It wasn’t long before things were hosed down and cooler head prevailed.  But I had to go THERE.  I had to change the wording.  I had to change the phrasing to get my point across very clearly.  Suddenly, by a change of word or phrase, things were different.

In looking at the state of this country – I can’t help but wonder how we got to the point where we place people who are obscenely wealthy on such platforms that we, basically, worship them.  The Oprahs, the Trumps, the Rockefellers, the owner of Papa Johns, the Walton family of Walmart, etc.  These are some people who make a GAJILLION dollars a year and instead of a society that says – “You know, it’s better for you to live in a 20 room house with a 10 car garage and a moat and make $10,000,000 a year instead of living in four 20 room houses, with 40 car garages and make $100,000,000.”  Think just for a minute how much more success the Walton Family, and the Walmart infrastructure would have if they just decided to cut their pay by, say, 90%.

Take a look at their family’s wealth as of 2012 – according to Forbes:

• Christy Walton and family US$25.3 billion^[2]
• Jim Walton US$23.7 billion^[2]
• Alice Walton US$23.3 billion^[2]
• S. Robson Walton US$23.1 billion^[3]
• Ann Walton Kroenke US$3.9 billion^[2]
• Nancy Walton Laurie US$3.4 billion^[2]

Just how much money should one person truly have?

Just so we’re clear – because it’s kinda run together.  Those are BILLIONS.  BILLIONS.  A combined wealth of 102 BILLION dollars.  I will say that probably most of that is stock options or what not but I could probably think they could survive just as well on $100 million, oh, hell, $500 million than $25.3 billion or $23.7 billion.  Heck, how about you keep 5 Billion and send the other 20 billion back into the workers of Walmart?  You know how this would help our country?

Good times!

Bad times!

 Of course the conservatives (and others) would say that this is socialism, a distribution of wealth, etc.  I would tend to agree – except for the very fact that these folks got to their 102 BILLION on the backs of the middle class.  Not giving them good healthcare (guess who pays for the  healthcare they don’t get – you and me Joe Taxpayer), paying them poor salaries so they need assistance (guess where that assistance comes from – you and me Joe Taxpayer), etc. etc. etc.  They made their billions by pushing every envelope and exploiting every loophole and much of what is left over because they don’t pay people a decent wage – or in the extreme wiped out entire communities (see my Going Out of Business commentary) and those unemployment/welfare/government assistance programs, etc. are paid for by you and me.  C’mon, Christy.  Live off of $5 billion and give the other 20 billion back to your workers.  How ‘bout it Jimbo, want to live off of $3 billion and put the other 20 billion into eradicating poverty?  How’s about you give that a try....

One Chart

Another chart with more words and statistics.

 But here’s the deal.  We let this all get a pass because not only do we think it’s OKAY.  We think it’s the AMERICAN WAY.  As if Joan and Ward Clever were just waiting for a moment to invest in Apple and become millionaires overnight.  That somehow it’s just fine for them to horde money and have vast amounts of wealth and let the American Taxpayer die by a million cuts.

What of those “overnight” millionaires?  As much as the wealth of the Walton family is obscene, at least they created a company that hires people and puts people to work all over the world.  I can give them a pass, in a sense, for that because they truly did start from the ground up and now have a large Gross Domestic Product than many small countries combined.  The true villain in this whole equation is the banker/day-trader/stock broker.  The person who makes  a million on a flip of a market term.  A person who makes a million on a tricky investment.  These people, truly, are the scum of the earth.

When Hewlett Packard got started in their garage – they made a product which had to be tested, manufactured and sold.  There’s some “skin in the game.”  There’s risk – massive risk – both financially and physically.  Anyone who dreams up the next invention deserves props for getting there.  You build a better mousetrap and all that jazz...  But these investment brokers/traders/bankers, what not, they don’t create anything.  They’re not creating a product which puts people to work.  They’re not creating the next “new thing” that is going to bring customers to their door and input money back into the monetary network.  They’re manipulating facts and figures and creating lies upon which they can make more millions with one phone call and one push of the button.

But...where is the outrage?  Where are the angry hordes?!  Where is the shame?  At what juncture did these people get where it’s seemingly okay to rob people blind legally and illegally?

Where this turn of phrasing and choice of words comes down to is simply that we, as a nation, as a people, need to rephrase our acceptance of massive wealth.  Either by paying your staff so little that the American taxpayer needs to compensate or by manipulating the markets to the point where you can destroy an economy?  We need to find the words.  We need to find the comparisons.  We need to find the way to speak the anger and frustration in a way that makes clear and rational sense to whoever hears it.  And we need to do it now.

Love you all...as a friend.

Going Out Of Business

 Not just a K-Mart but a "Big" K-Mart

K-Mart is closing down.  Not all of them, just the one I shop at on Aurora.  Reminds me of when the previous K-Mart closed down.  The one I used to shop at ALL THE TIME.

It always bothers me to see something close down.  I spent many an hour outside in the early morning hours to get the deals at my local CompUSA, before it closed down.  I shopped at Circuit City until it closed down.  Borders – damn – spent many a dollar there, too.  And this doesn’t count all the movie theatres I used to frequent that have all made their way to the dustbins of memories.  Where all that’s left is someone saying as you drive by:  “Wasn’t the old ….. there?”

I stood by one of those poles at 6 a.m. one time.

Like I say it always bothers me when something closes down.  I can’t help but feel for the all the workers.  I had always assumed that since Sears and K-Mart were now siblings – that would give the Aurora K-Mart a bit more breathing room.  Plus there was all the new housing construction right across the street.  200+ people in the ‘hood just waiting to buy XXXXL polyester stretch pants.  But no.

All those workers – out on the street.  Given some paltry stipend to tide them over for a couple months.  Maybe if some are lucky they’ll be able to work at a Sears.  Or maybe K-Mart will give them a good lay-off/severance package.  But it’s gotta hurt.

Just recently I found out that the 44^th Avenue Blockbuster was closing down.  This was following in the heels of the Ballinger Blockbuster that closed down.  For these closings, though, I’m not all that sad.

HA HA HA - A TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDICINE!

(executives only)

 

Now, don’t get me wrong – I’m sad about the employees.  Bummed even.  It’s a damn shame they have to deal with this BS of finding a new job and all – but I don’t give a good gol-darn about the upper management of Blockbuster – not after what they did.

When Miriam and I moved into Mountlake Terrace in 1986 we had, at least, a half-dozen video stores in a 2 mile radius.  One at Ballinger, one by the post office, one over by Olson’s (now QFC), one across 220^th, one by Sorelli’s pizza and even Roger’s Marketplace had a small video store inside.  These were great little “mom-and-pop” places.  Lots of money invested, good clientele, decent selection.  But then Blockbuster came in and with their buying power – they put all of them out of business.  Then…they were stupid enough to not change or grow or innovate and then RedBox and Netflix put THEM out of business!  How do you like me now?!

Mmmmm...yummy....

 

But underneath all this is the frustrating and anger filled knowledge that the people who made these poor business decisions (or lack of them) that caused the company’s demise won’t really have to “pay the piper.”

Let us, for a moment, focus on one such executive:  Ron Johnson

J.C. Penney stores have been around for over 100 years.  My step-sister has worked at one for over 20 years (if not 30 years).

That's right!  Penney with an "E"

 Ron Johnson, born in 1959 (younger than my brother, five years older than me), is a graduate of Stanford University and Harvard Business School.  His biggest claim to fame is that he created the innovative Apple Retail Stores.  He also worked at Target and Mervyns.  In the 7.5 years he worked at Apple he made a fortune of $400 million dollars.  The guy’s brilliant, no doubt, and extremely wealthy…so it make sense that J. C. Penney, when it wanted to do a re-launch, went out and hired the best.  The best who has, so far, nearly ruined J. C. Penney.

Ron "Rich Guy" Johnson

 

Coming on in June of 2011, Ron Johnson has overseen massive lay-offs, closings of catalog stores, shutting down of other stores, rebranding, rethinking, re-imagining.  A year later, after laying off 13% of its corporate headquarters in Dallas in April, another 350 were let go in July of 2012.

After massive lay-offs and a selling campaign that has flopped big time, J. C. Penney has been hemorrhaging money.  The stock has been crashing, people have been calling for Mr. Johnson’s head and J. C. Penney is, frankly, in the toilet.

Will they lay off more workers?  Will ALL the stores close?  Will my step-sister lose her job?  Who knows…but I can tell you this:  Mr. Johnson will do juuuuuuuuuuuuust fine.

What truly galls me about these executives is that they are, basically, immune to the day-to-day.  No matter how many “Undercover Bosses” they show on TV – there are bosses like Ron Johnson who, most likely, has never had to worry a day in his life about money.  His father was an executive at General Mills.  His mother was a “homemaker.”  Sounds like he had the idyllic “Leave it to Beaver” life and, certainly, enough money and/or chutzpah to get into Stanford and then Harvard Business School.  You’ve got to figure that Mr. 400 Million Dollar guy signed on to J. C. Penney with big stock options, use of the corporate jet, an executive package the likes people haven’t seen and all he’s done so far is oversee massive layoffs and a destruction of the brand.  He’s not a warehouse worker who put in 20 years who is going to be told that he’s no longer needed.  Even if J. C. Penney were to go belly-up tomorrow Mr. Johnson had his very expensive attorneys put in all sorts of clauses so that he still gets massive amounts of money and doesn’t have to worry another day in his life.

If I was to do what Mr. Johnson did?  I’d have been fired a loooooong time ago.  No severance, no bonus, no unemployment benefits, nothing.

Being unemployed sucks.  Having $400+ Million doesn't suck.

 

So as K-Mart lays off dozens of lower and middle class workers, as Blockbusters close down like so many of the little video stores did, as more companies go out of business or cut back or cut costs – remember these CEO’s who through intelligence and money have parlayed themselves a really sweet deal all around.  And why that is, in a lot of a ways, completely and totally offensive.

And, still, there is a huge faction of people out there in these United States who fully think it's fine to earn as much as you want, lay-off/fire/disenfranchise as many people as you want and end your life with massive amounts of wealth because that's how to live.  How is it that laying off 350 workers isn't on the equivalent of punching a 50 year old single mother in the face because that's basically, what they're doing.

Reflections on 30 years in law

I remember it like it was yesterday.  In Junior High School I remember telling myself:  “Self, you’re going to graduate from high school, not go to college, get a job working as a temp in some law firm somewhere, make three thousand dollars (seemed a lot in 1978), move to L.A. and try to become a movie star.”

Four out of five ain’t bad.  And how many people truly to move to L.A. with $3K and become a movie star?  There was logical reason as to why I didn’t end up in L.A. and that was because Seattle was quickly becoming “Hollywood North” and why fight up-stream when Hollywood was coming up here.  (Please Note:  Seattle was “Hollywood North” for about two years and then Hollywood went more North and has camped in Vancouver, B.C. ever since.)

But this blog isn’t about my failed acting career – it is focused on “get a job working as a temp in some law firm somewhere” and as of January 3, 2013 I will have worked in law in some capacity for 30 years.

In the fall/winter of 1982 I was working as a Santa at Aurora Village Mall and did a week-long temp job through my temp company “Hallmark Temps” working in a stamp making factory.  Again, another blog for another time.  But January 3^rd, 1983 I landed my first job working in a Law firm.  It was “Betts Patterson & Mines” and I was brought in to work on the WPPSS litigation.  At the time it was the largest class action suit ever brought and where money can be found – you’ll find attorneys.  Most every law firm in Seattle was pulled into the case and “BP&M” was right in the thick of it representing Chemical Bank.  I was hired, as a temp, to organize binders.  My desk was a window sill in the Bank of California Building.

Little did I know that this “bill paying job” would expand out for 30 years.  Sounds like a career...don’t it?  Sounds like a vocation.  A calling.  Well for me, and for every day of those 30 years it has been simply what it has been:  A job.  You see, normal people would gladly focus on what they wanted to do, get that education, seek that job, find it, and live (hopefully) happily-ever-after.  And if maybe I had actually raised the $3K and gone to Hollywood I would be sipping margaritas by my pool in Hollywood while servants waited on me hand and foot – three Oscars on my mantle, a gajillion dollars in my bank account, etc. but one makes their choices and my choice (besides marriage, home mortgage, children, etc.) was to stay in law...and write.

There are those lucky few who actually get a job they love doing.  As someone once said:  “Find a job you love and you’ll never work another day in your life.”  I refer to this as a “soul feeding” job.  A job that, while you’re doing it, you feel your soul being fed.  What feeds my soul?  Writing and teaching.  Try as I might, though, I can’t seem to make a living at either one...yet.  So if you can’t find your soul fulfilling job, you find a “bill paying job” and feed your soul on the side.

Some reflections on 30 years of “bill paying jobs:”

I’ve been sexually harassed.

I’ve been praised.

I’ve been put on an “improvement plan.”

I’ve been honored.

I’ve been yelled at – even in a meeting with all staff.

I’ve had to fire people.

I’ve had to hire people.

I’ve heard more stories about the most bizarre things you can even imagine (tattooed teeth?).

I’ve cried.

I’ve been cried on.

I’ve sent out e-mails to “all-hands” when I shouldn’t have.

I’ve found seemingly lost documents that no one else could find.

I’ve made more than 10,000 boxes, at least.

I’ve copied more than a million pages, at least.

I’ve watched friends get laid off.

I’ve played “good cop” to HR’s “bad cop.”

I’ve watched a co-worker eat 40 mini Hershey bars in one sitting.

I’ve coordinated attacks on leftovers from various meetings to feed my staff and co-workers.

I’ve pissed people off.

I’ve never been fired (yet).

I’ve worked with some AMAZING people.

I’ve worked with people I could go the rest of my life and not see again and I’d be fine.

I’ve flirted.

I’ve acted like an idiot.

I’ve said the wrong thing.

I’ve done the wrong thing.

I’ve run the streets of Seattle delivering documents on deadline.

I’ve mentored.

I’ve been mentored.

I’ve taken advantage of an open bar and a buffet.

I’ve been trained.

I’ve done training.

I’ve worked hours of overtime.

I’ve fallen asleep at my desk.

I’ve believed we’ve been working on a higher purpose.

I’ve believed we’re just doing what we’re doing to make a living.

I’ve lost co-workers to the great law-firm in the sky.

I’ve made enemies.

I’ve made friends.

I’ve lived.

The simply reality of a “bill-paying job” is that I would leave it in a heartbeat if I sold a script or won the lotto and was able to feed my soul.

But, you may ask, after 30 years did NONE of this feed your soul?  Well – when I was managing a department – that was when I truly felt like I was doing something to better this world.  I worked hard to be the manager that I always wanted to have and (sadly, more often than not – did not have).  I may not have been the best manager – but I know my staff believed in me and respected me.

But feed my soul?  If I’m being truly honest – working 30 years in law has not fed my soul – it has EXPANDED my soul.  And that, besides bringing home a paycheck and working in-doors, has been worth it.

To another 30 years.  Or when I sell that script.  Whichever comes first.