DId Hollywood Finally Kill the Spec Screenwriter?

It has been well over six months since I last stood in front of a white board scribbling and drawing and talking about structure, characters and beats.  Sadly, I had only three people sign up for the Spring session of my screenwriting class and it wasn’t worth the gas and parking money to drive the 24 miles round trip.  Taking Spring quarter off, I put my chips on Fall quarter and eagerly anticipated the hordes of five or six people to sign up.  So far I have one signed up...and I think it’s a former student who has already taken my class three times.

When a good friend and co-writer, with a possible spec sale pending, decided to give up writing altogether and e-mails from the Screenwriting Expo appear to become more and more desperate – I wondered if Hollywood had finally killed the spec screenwriter.

As a matter of clarification the Spec Screenwriter is a regular person, your average Joe, your Susie secretary, your neighbor, the barista, that annoying guy in your carpool with a screenplay idea and a dream.  That dream, of course, is to make it big in Hollywood.  These aren’t contract players.  These aren’t veterans who had success at some point and are on the speed dial of a producer who has access to money.  These aren’t “names” who wrote a book that is now being turned into a screenplay.  These are you and me.  Struggling mightily against the Hollywood tide to get a script read, optioned, bought and made.  With only our dreams and maybe a connection or two at our disposal.

How did Hollywood kill off the Spec Screenwriter?  Simply through a complete lack of, or desire for, originality.  In 2011 alone there were more than 30 sequels and remakes that were released to the hungry public.  From “Harry Potter” to “Straw Dogs” to “Cars II” to “Transformers” – 2011 saw time and time again the same product in just different packaging fill multitudes of screens.  I’m not making a judgment call on the quality of the film, I’m just stating that these were made and there are only a limited number of movie screens out there to show them.

Before you complain that a film like “The Help” got made and had success and it’s not a sequel or a remake – remember that it came from a very popular book.  “Thor” wasn’t a sequel, but it had a built-in graphic novel audience.  I’m not quibbling over what is a success or what is not a success – I’m quibbling over perceptions.  And when the perception is that Hollywood is only interested in BIG BUDGET BLOCKBUSTER TENT-POLE BASED ON A POPULAR NOVEL WITH BIG STARS SEQUEL/PREQUEL/REMAKE WITH BUILT-IN FOUR QUADRANT AUDIENCE AND SOME WAY COOL SPECIAL EFFECTS MADE FOR A 100 BAJILLION DOLLARS it doesn’t give a lot of hope to my co-writer or those coffee shop screenwriters who really think that the story of their grandparent’s adventures in South America in 1937 is something Hollywood will want and/or buy...no matter how brilliantly written it might be.

You see, when I teach my Beginning Screenwriting class (and actually have more than four students...) – I inevitably get one student who has what I call the “lotto mentality” of screenwriting.  They’re the one that thinks that all they have to do is write a script and somehow get their hands on Steven Spielberg’s gardener’s-brother’s-neighbor’s phone number and within a year they’ll be at the Academy Awards flirting with Juliette Binoche.  It takes me eight weeks to slowly get it into their head that it doesn’t work that way.  That it takes hard work and perseverance and more than one script to get through those doors.  That passion won’t do it alone.  You need to work on STORY, STORY and, you know, STORY.

And then, AND THEN, you add on the Sequel/Prequel/Remake/Tent-Pole perception of Hollywood and you might as well tell them to give up.  Sadly, I think it has worked.

But...is this a bad thing?  Is killing off the Spec Screenwriter really that bad?  Speaking from my standpoint (twenty spec scripts plus directing a low budget feature film) do I really mind that maybe the fringe writers are falling away?  Certainly I’m bothered that I don’t have students in my class – but am I really that upset that people might not be attending events like the Script Expo?  Is having less competition on the playing field a good thing as I, and some friends of mine, continue to write and push no matter how bleak it may look?

When I coached pee-wee soccer forever ago I talked to a friend who grew up in Nigeria.  He said that if a kid soccer player in Nigeria was terrible they told him, straight up:  “Don’t play, become a doctor or a teacher or something.  You suck.”  I told him that’s not how it’s done in America.  That we, as a people, have a tendency to always say:  “Believe in your dreams!  You can accomplish anything you put your mind to!  Even if you don’t have sellable ideas, don’t know how to format your script, have terrible character arc and have no clue as to how Hollywood works.”

Not anymore.  With sequels/prequels/remakes dominating the Hollywood scene – no longer can Joe Sixpack with a script in his back pocket think that all he has to do is drive to Hollywood and pitch his idea and get handed a big fat check.  Though, sadly, the appearance is still there.  Just the other night I watched the “Tonight Show with Jay Leno” – a show I never ever watch and it contained a “Pitch to America” segment.  The producers of the show interview spec screenwriters who are at a pitching event.  Giving the writer an opportunity to “Pitch to America” the very idea they’re pitching to mid-level lackey at some no-name production company.  This gives Jay and his worldwide audience an opportunity to then laugh at said pitch (and pitcher) and decide if it was “sold” or “not sold.”  Of course the most outlandish idea is usually “sold” but what, exactly, does that mean?  For those sitting at home “sold” sounds like someone said:  “Mr. Spec Screenwriter Person here’s a check for $10,000, we want to buy your idea.”  Chances are “sold” really just means that mid-level lackey said:  “yeah, sure, we’ll take a look at your script” and no money actually changes hands.

Is that enough to keep the hordes coming?  Screenplay contests that cost $40, $50, $75 per script and promise some sort of possible potential?  Paying hundreds of dollars for pitching sessions?  All to keep them looking for that “Rich and Famous” contract that Kermit and Friends got in “The Muppet Movie” (another film with a sequel pending).  Or...is the writing finally on the wall of the mall multiplex covered with posters advertising “Spider-Man” the remake that the Spec Screenwriter is dead?

Update:  I wrote this back in 2011 when sequels and prequels were at their highest peak.  At this time, 2012-2013 film seasons are supposed to have over 50 remakes. 

God and my E-mail

I’ve been a member of AOL for as long as I can remember.  I don’t know when, exactly, I started my e-mail account – but it must have been a few months after AOL started.  For years I paid $10 a month for something like 500 minutes on a dial-up modem.  And for years we had to hope we didn’t get important calls while I was going on line to check my e-mails.  Oh, those were the modem squealing days.  It was slow, it was a pain, but there was no other way to get on the “Information Super Highway!”

Note:  This was loooong before Facebook and blogs and Youtube, etc.  To get on AOL you had to use floppy, yes, floppy discs.  They came in the mail, they were stuck in magazines, they were given out.

Also note:  At this time I had an IBM Computer with a 12” full color monitor.  It ran at 12 megahertz and had a whopping 40 megabyte hard drive.  For youse kids out there with your cell phones and MP3 players and cameras....1 GIG is 1000 megabytes.  That 4 gigabyte flash drive?  That is 4000 megs.  That is 100 TIMES larger than my first computer’s hard drive.  And one Terabyte is 1000 gigabytes.  This computer cost us about $1,300 from Costco.  I could go to Best Buy today and buy 3 laptops for the same amount we paid.

Soon after buying the computer I sold my ENTIRE Nintendo System – and about 50 games – to a friend so I could get enough money for a sound card (a move I still regret today).  I then also purchased a program called a “stacker” that would make my 40 meg hard drive into an 80 meg hard drive.

Still – it was soon after I was entering the computer age – that I had to get a modem and get on-line.  Who the hell was e-mailing me anyway?  I took a quick look on my AOL account now and, sadly, my e-mail only goes back to 2003.  That’s 9 YEARS AGO.  But it was new and exciting and I was on AOL which meant I was cool.

Cut to 2012.  AOL isn’t cool any more.  At least to my friend Keith, and he makes a valid point.  If he’s doing business with someone that is purporting to be “hip,” “with-it,” and “now.”  They can’t have grandma’s AOL account.  But since I’ve had it for forever and it’s free.  What’s to stop me from using it.

A few weeks ago, though, I got an interesting e-mail.  It was from “Almighty God” and he had a message for me.  I opened the e-mail (well, certainly, God wouldn’t send SPAM) and it was the “Time for war, time for peace...” scripture out of the Bible.  But here’s what confused me...this e-mail went into my SPAM box.  I would think that the “Almighty,” the “Head Honcho,” “The Big Cheese,” would somehow get around the SPAM filter.  Either AOL has a kick-ass SPAM filter that even filters out God or, God has to fix the way he e-mails.

After I read that e-mail, I noticed I haven’t received any more e-mails from “Almighty God.”  Well, maybe someday he’ll contact me again.  But I do look in my SPAM folder occasionally to see if God is trying to contact me.

What I Want from My Country

The questions came fast and furious from my friend Mark.  He announces to me that he is a conservative with some liberal leanings (pro-choice, pro legalization of Marijuana) and that he’s already, reluctantly, voting for Romney.  Still – knowing that I’m a liberal – he wanted to know what I thought about politics, the country, etc.

Just so we understand - this is a civil conversation.  He’s certainly entitled to his opinion as I am to mine.  In this world of more accelerated conversations, especially when it comes to politics, it seems our leaders want to spend more time yelling and pointing fingers and lying – than they want to have a civil discourse, teach each other something and come to some sort of compromise on how to better this country and this country’s future.  The lines are drawn, let the arguing begin.  But not so with my friend Mark.  He’s curious and I’m willing to talk, but also willing to say that I don’t have all the answers.

As I explained what I thought about the state of U.S. of A. it finally came down to a basic understanding of what I think that government SHOULD be responsible for and what they SHOULDN’T be responsible for.  Thus what I want from my country:

(Please note, these are in no particular order.)

1.  Protect me and my family and fight the wars.  Of course, these should be just and proper wars.  I can’t possibly defend this country.  Put a gun in my hand and I’m more likely to shoot myself in the foot than the person attacking.  But what this means is to have a solid defense so that if we are attacked – we can attack back.  Let me clarify, though.  This does not go for countries that didn’t attack us, or are not a threat.  This also means going through the discretionary defense budget and cutting funds for things so we’re not just spending money on top of money.  More and more money should be spent on putting “brains on the ground” as opposed to “boots on the ground.”   We’ve got smart people in this government and allies around the world – we should be able to work with our friends to figure out solutions before we put American soldiers in harm’s way.

2.  Regulate, investigate, prosecute and punish financial institutions or companies that do harm to America.  I can’t fight the banks.  My refusing to shop at so-and-so store isn’t going to make a dent in their bottom line.  I can write letters and e-mail and hold a sign but even 100 of us don’t have the power that the government has to regulate and investigate the shadow goings-on on Wall Street, or Big Oil, or the Tobacco Industry or any of those large organizations that find it cheaper to out-source jobs overseas while taking millions of dollars of taxpayer money into their coffers.  If we’re paying Big Oil billions of dollars in tax breaks, tax incentives, etc. – then they shouldn’t be polluting our gulf streams and gutting our work forces.  If we’re subsidizing huge banks and investment firms so they “don’t go under” – they shouldn’t turn around and give huge bonuses to their corporate honchos.  I don’t care if they somehow “wrote it in their contract” or some such crap like that.  When you have a kid, you may give them an allowance as long as they “cleaned their room” or “put away their dishes” or “mowed the lawn.”  Why do we not expect huge organizations to do the same when we’re handing them billions of dollars?  Stop giving them money until they own up and do what has been asked.

3.  Provide healthcare for everyone.  I can’t help everyone.  I can only do so much.  So I expect my government to step up and help those who are hurting and struggling.  I’m more than willing to pay more in taxes to provide healthcare for everyone.  It’s the right thing to do.  30 or 40 million Americans without healthcare?  That’s shameful.  Especially for this supposed “greatest country in the world.”  England has universal healthcare, so does Canada.  And we can’t do that here?  Also, no healthcare company or hospital or medical organization should be FOR PROFIT.  When you put “for profit” in the background, they’re going to do everything they can to make a profit.  It’s a no brainer.  When pharmaceutical companies saw huge potential cash cows from advertising things like boner pills, sleeping pills, anti-anxiety medication, etc. then the shift went from helping people to helping their bottom line.  That should never ever EVER be the ultimate goal of any hospital or medical organization or pharmaceutical company.  Helping the patient should be the bottom line.  And if my government can do something about that – then it should.

4.  Stay out of my bedroom, stay out of my doctor’s office, stay out of my love life.  The GOP is always the party of small government but hundreds of bills have been introduced on the federal and local levels to make abortion illegal – some forcing ultrasounds, some saying what your doctor is allowed and not allowed to tell you, etc.  It’s all there to make the pregnant woman feel guilt, shame, hurt – even if this decision is already a heartbreaking one, or if she was raped.  I can’t put myself in that woman’s shoes and neither should the government.  The baby is not a baby until it’s born, I don’t care what photos you have from 2 weeks to 20 weeks.  And, by God, if you’re going to fight for that unborn baby – then when it comes out – you should fight for health coverage for that baby until it’s 18 years of age.

5.  Legalize pot, and other now illegal drugs and tax them.  I’m not an advocate of drug use.  I’ve never smoked pot, never smoked a cigarette, etc.  And, guess what, even if they were legal...I still wouldn’t do it.  BILLIONS of dollars every year are spent on this “war on drugs” – countless hours are used to fight this “war on drugs.”  Call it won, take it over.  It would gut the gang activity, stop the drugs and people coming in from Mexico and other places and provide a huge amount of funds to get to the heart of why anyone uses drugs.  Money for therapy, money for state coffers, money for the masses to build a better world where people won’t feel a need to smoke dope or take other drugs.

6.  Provide an education, FOR EVERYONE.  A learned group of people, is a curious group of people.  These children will grow up to be the future of this country.  Most likely they will be helping all us old farts reach into the depths of our old age.  Do we really want a country that can’t provide a decent education?  Here’s a thought, take 10% of the defense budget and put it towards building new schools, hiring new teachers, paying for more college education, etc.  (I’ll get into the paying for all this in a moment.)

7.  Level the playing field from the haves, the sort-of-haves and the have-nots.  There’s something about the rich folk (the 1%) that is different than the 99%.  And that is they have money.  Money = power.  Power to hire attorneys to negotiate contracts so if they lose their high-paying job after 3 months, they walk away with a cool million dollars.  Power to hire tax accountants to figure out that they can re-word something so they save 3% in taxes, and if they out-source jobs overseas, they’ll see an uptick of 15% profit growth.  Power to buy politicians to change the laws in their favor.  Power to exploit, power to coerce, power to influence.  That’s what money gets you.  And guess what, 99% don’t have the money to do that.  It’s the job, in my opinion, of the U.S. Government to level that playing field.  Take out the loop holes, adjust the tax rates, transparency of who is buying off who, get this back to a level field.  But...wait!  You say:  “These rich people, they’ve earned their position!”  I don’t denigrate a good job, I don’t discourage opportunity, but they didn’t do it on their own.  They did it because they got a good education, they were taught by good teachers, they were provided shelter by their parents.  No one is a success on their own.  And anyone who believes so is sadly mistaken.  For those rich people who think we’re just envious (as Mitt Romney told Matt Lauer) that couldn’t be farther than the truth.  We want fairness and our government has the power to create a more level playing field.

Is all this “pie in the sky” dreaming?  I know what you might say:  “Well, golly, Matt, how we gonna pay for all this?”

Let’s break it down for each one.

1.  If you cut 10, 15, 20% of the defense budget you would be amazed at what you could do with those billions.  Everything from education to healthcare can be easily and quickly impacted.

2.  By providing regulations and cutting back on loopholes and cutting out subsidized corporate welfare, that’s another savings of billions of dollars that can go elsewhere.

3.  Providing healthcare for everyone doesn’t seem like a money saver out of the box...and it’s not.  It’s what I would call “good debt.”   By doing this, small companies, big companies wouldn’t have to pay out as much in their employee’s healthcare – giving them more money for research, paychecks, etc.  But...in the long run...everyone would be healthier so there is not such a burden on the system going forward.  Yeah, it might take some time, but eventually we all would be basically paying for preventative care and not so much emergency care.

4.  By having the government mind its own business in the personal world of the bedroom, the doctor’s office, the wedding ceremony – it would have more time to deal with all those other issues that impact the majority of Americans.

5.  Legalizing and taxing drugs would provide immediate cash to states to provide better educations, better rehab therapy, better support network and free up the police to concentrate on more important things then that half-an-ounce of pot.

6.  Providing an education is another vision of “good debt.”  A smarter group of students is a more innovative group of students that will create jobs, create a smarter America, create a brighter future.  You invest XX amount of dollars in one student, you may see XXXXXXX amount later.

7.  Leveling the playing field, taking away loopholes, adjusting to a more fair tax rate – these are all things that would help lower the debt and raise funds...and trust me...the rich will be JUUUUUUUST fine.

So that’s it.  That’s what I expect from the government and I didn’t even touch on clean water, non-poisonous food, clean air, mail service, safe flying, social security, etc.  Maybe that’s for my NEXT blog.  Okay – I’ll wait a while to touch on those....

Respect the Queue

RESPECT THE QUEUE

When we were recently in Anaheim ready to go to Disneyland, we caught the Anaheim Resort Transit (ART) to take us to the park.  We had to catch the ART out in front of the hotel next door to ours.  They had a nice covered area, a machine to buy tickets, benches, etc.

One of the early times we took the ART when we got to the shelter there was already a couple families waiting.  But, by waiting, I mean they were wandering hither and yon and chatting and talking like a mixer for kids hopped up on jellybeans. 

Seeing that there was no defined “queue” we took a spot near where the door would open for the bus.  Immediately I could tell that we had broken some queue etiquette as I saw a husband/father and his wife/mother whispering to each other and staring/glaring at us.  Within a couple minutes the father said:  “Uh, we were here FIRST.”  We apologized and got in the queue that was now, uh, queuing up out of the shelter.  My response should have been:  “Dude, if you’re going to create a queue, CREATE A QUEUE.  Line up, keep your kids in line, and by GOD stand where the bus is going to stop.  Not just inside the shelter.  And how do I know you’re not out here waiting for a cab or your drunken grandmother or whatever?”  But I nodded and we got in line.  At which point Miriam said:  “Geez, didn’t know there was a queue.”  Well, how would you?

At the transit station where I catch my bus every morning we have a queue.  Everyone arrives and lines up as they arrived.  There are four busses that stop at the transit center and everyone knows the rules.  When bus arrives, step out of queue line and enter the bus.  The remaining people can then move down and fill in the gaps.  If you are running late and see the bus from the walk-way, the proper procedure is to catch up to the line, but wait until the last person gets on the bus to enter – thus taking your proper space in line.  Occasionally there’s a bit of confusion as you can’t tell who has moved away from the line and who has shown up and you might end up cutting off the second-to-last person, or something.  But this is usually resolved with a quick “oops, sorry.”  And, besides, at this point the chances of getting a seat on the bus are slim – so the big difference is that you’re either standing 10 feet away from the door or eight feet away from the door.

This is how it’s done...EVERY DAY.  Going home, with the bus stops catering to well over 10-20 busses, there’s no queue and it’s every person for themselves.

This morning as I arrived to catch my bus, the 511 had just left the station.  The 413 had left approx. 5 minutes before that – so I was in the “lull” between busses.  Most likely the 415 would be coming next, followed by the next 413.  I could take any or all of these busses (lucky me) but the 413 is the fastest trip and I get to walk to work a bit, thus burning off a few calories on my way to work – but I digress.

When I arrived, since it was the lull, there were maybe 9 people in front of me.  I took my spot in the queue and waited as more people fell in line behind me.

Soon enough we had a good line when the 415 showed up and people got on and after people stepped out and stepped on, I had moved up about 5 spots to number 4 in the queue.  My bus, the 413, would be next.

As the minutes ticked away a massive amount of people showed up and started getting in the queue which was now lengthening quite a bit.  10, 15, 20+ the line started to stretch.  Then, approximately 3 minutes before the 413 was due to arrive, a young(ish) woman, professionally dressed, walked down the stairs and stood RIGHT in front of where the bus would stop.  My initial thought was that maybe she was just going to check her phone or something, look at the bus arrival information.  I mean, of course she’s not going to disrespect the queue and just place herself at the front.  Could she?

She looked up and saw the line stretching now almost to the end of the platform and there were still people arriving and now walking past her to get to their place in the queue.  She WAS going to do this.  She WAS going to place herself in front of EVERYONE.  Which then makes me wonder what she could possibly be thinking?  Is she THAT SO IMPORTANT that she gets to dictate who sits where and when?  Is she THAT SO IMPORTANT that she feels she has the right to go to the head of the line?  REALLY?  And, again, this isn’t like our Disneyland confusion where people were milling about like it was a social gathering.  DOESN’T SHE SEE THE LINE?!

When the 413 finally arrived she did, indeed, just get right on the bus.  Now, for me, being number 4 or 5 or whatever – I knew there was a good chance I’d get a seat (which I did) – but if I was number 22 or 28 or 37 I would be PISSED.

Since I couldn’t comprehend that someone could be both so clueless and thoughtless I started making excuses for her:  “Maybe she doesn’t understand.”  “Maybe this is her first time taking the bus.”  “Maybe she’s a selfish idiot.”  Now, I hadn’t seen her before at the bus stop so think that it might be option number two but, most likely, it’s option number three.

On a whole, I try not to let things bother me.  Especially petty little things like these.  But, damn, you’ve got to respect the queue.

My Unwritten Baseball Rules

Matt’s Unwritten Baseball Rules (now written down)

A few weeks ago, I came across an article entitled “21 unwritten rules of baseball” (or something like that – I’ll try to find the link) and it had your standard rules:  Don’t step on the pitcher’s mound, don’t bunt on a pitcher throwing a no-hitter, etc.

Okay, I didn't find the one I reference above, but I did find this:

http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/gallery/baseball_unwritten_rules/

As the Mariner’s season becomes more and more awash in wasted plays and wasted moments – I’m reminded of some of MY unwritten rules of baseball.

Now, case in point, I’ve never played baseball.  I couldn’t hit a ball if my life depended on it.  The one time I tried out for my firm’s softball team I beyond sucked at it.  So, yes, it’s easy for me in the comfort of my chair, to judge what is going on within the confines of a baseball team but – for what seems so completely obvious to ME – I just don’t understand how it’s not completely obvious to THEM.

The first rule I’m going to talk about is “play for that one run.”  In the previous it article the unwritten rule is to NOT play for that one run as, most likely, that’s all you’ll get.  I could care less.  You win games by...scoring runs.  And I’ve seen many a game won on one run (or lost on one run).  The other aspect of scoring a run on someone is that you’ve now put them in a bit of a corner, a chink in their armor and to do so, maybe you forced that pitcher to throw stress pitches, get out of his rhythm, make a mistake.  So what does this mean for all you non-baseball people?  What it simply means is moving the runners up.  You got a runner on first with no outs – bunt him to second.  Runners on first and second with no outs – bunt them over.  It’s very simple (well, to say at least).  I don’t care if you’ve got Mr. Home Run Hitter out there swinging the bat – he needs to get the runners over to scoring position.  He’s got three strikes to play with.  Try it with the first two, swing away for the last one.  Move the runners over and play for that one run.  As announcer Ron Fairly once said:  “You play for that one run, you might just get more.”  Hell, I’d be happy with one.

Also note:  If you don’t have a solid power hitter on your team – you’ll have to manufacture runs.  That means more stolen bases, more bunts, more contact plays, etc.  Too often I see teams that seem to believe, somehow, that on that particular day – Babe Ruth himself is going to inhabit one of your players.  It ain’t gonna happen.

Second rule; force the pitcher to play out of his element.  In other words, you as a batter have a certain amount of control when it comes to the game.  When a pitcher is “on his game” it usually means he’s got a good rhythm going, he’s hitting his spots, he gets the ball and he pitches it.  Slow the game down.  Step out, step in, call time-out, step out, step in, look around.  Get the pitcher out of his game and into his head.  It seems, especially with the Mariners, that they don’t do this.  It’s as if they’ve given the game over to the pitcher to let him do what he wants.

Third rule; do not, do not, DO NOT, DO NOT swing at the first pitch when a runner is on 3^rd base.  Especially if they’re on 3^rd base with less than two outs.  As a rule, I would say never ever ever never swing at the first pitch but I understand that players want to “be aggressive” or “look for a pitch to drive” and pitchers usually like to start off with a fast ball....but...if they know that you’re aggressive, they know they can throw it outside or low and you’ll most likely swing at it.  But back to the guy on third base....  There are a number of ways that guy can score.  Wild pitch, pass ball, balk, base hit, error, steal.  Plus HE’S ON THIRD BASE, he had to get there somehow.  Most likely a hit, most likely another hit or error moved the runner along, in other words – the pitcher’s mind isn’t solely on the pitch he’s throwing to you – his mind is on a number of things (see balk, wild pitch, pass ball).  Too many times I have seen players get up to bat – the crowd is going crazy, the runner is off the bag on third, the pitcher is sweating bullets, the tying run (possibly the WINNING run) is just itching to go those 90 feet home, the announcer’s voice is catching with ever anticipated movement and the batter swings at the first pitch and out and game over.

On May 15^th, the Mariners were playing Boston.  Late in the game the M’s had a bit of a situation going on.  Runners at first and third, two outs.  The pitcher was into the 80’s on his pitches (and this is Josh Beckett – sporting a whopping 2-4 record and a 5.50 era).  He’s on the ropes.  M’s down by 4 runs.  So, yeah, a home run and you’re right back in it.  A good solid base hit and maybe Beckett is pulled from the game – what happens?  Seager, who is actually probably the best Mariner playing at this point in the season, swings at the first pitch.  Pop up.  Inning over.  WHY? 

Rule number 3:  Never ever ever EVER swing at the first pitch after a pitcher has just walked a batter OR has thrown more than 8 pitches to a batter.  In other words, let’s say the pitcher just battled with a batter for 12 pitches before either walking him and/or striking him out.  STAND THERE.  The guy has GOT to be tired, arm sore, beat.  Why make it easy on him to swing at the first pitch...especially if he walked the guy.  If he walked the guy the pressure is on the pitcher to keep him from scoring, keep him on first base, is he going to steal?, etc.  Swinging at the first pitch is stupid.

Rule number 4:  Know when to be aggressive.  Again, this reiterates what I’ve been writing.  It’s one thing to be aggressive early on in the game.  1^st, 2^nd, 3^rd inning – yeah, swing at the first pitch (unless the pitcher just walked a batter or there’s a man on third).  But after that – slow the game down – force the pitcher to play YOUR game – not their game.  And this gets me to another point...you ever watch football?  Basketball?  Coaches are constantly coaching.  It’s not uncommon to see football coaches getting in the faces of their players, most of the time it’s a position coach (defensive coach, special teams, etc.) or late in a game you’ll see a basketball coach call a time-out and write up a play on a board and coach his players.  I understand that baseball is a vastly different game than those – but I never see a coach talking to the players in the dugout. You know, why not a reminder to the guys going up to bat to maybe take a pitch or two?  Why not sit down with the 7, 8, 9 hitters and give them some tips on maybe shortening their swing – or talk about how the pitcher seems to be getting in a rhythm and to throw him off a bit.  What do I see?  I see managers (and assistant managers) watching the game, giving off signals and moving players with hand motions.  THAT’S IT.  Then, after the game, I have to listen to the coach say:  “Well, so-and-so, just wasn’t on his game today.”  Why don’t you, I don’t know, talk to so-and-so DURING the game and tell him that he needs to do this or that?  In the Mariner’s game it would have been great to see Wedge pull Seager aside before that late inning at bat and remind him:  “Hey, two on base, pitcher is getting tired.  Take a pitch or two.”  But we never see it.  It may happen, certainly, but...

Rule number 5:  This is for the managers.  Get thrown out of the game once-in-a-while.  A few seasons ago it was abundantly clear when the umpire’s strike zone was all over the place that the Mariner batters weren’t getting any good calls.  Time and again they were being called out on pitches way outside the zone.  I’m yelling at the TV and there’s the Manager just standing there spitting sunflower seeds.  Show some passion.  Take some risks.  Piss someone off.  I’m not saying you have to go all “Lou Piniella” on the base paths – but get a little worked up.  Show you’ve got your players’ backs.

Rule number 6:  This is for the pitchers.  Pitch to contact.  I know this sounds kind of crazy and this is one of those rules that is probably the hardest to get across, but pitchers have to learn to pitch to contact.  Too many times I see pitchers who think they’re Roger Clemens (before the steroids) or Randy Johnson who think they have to strike out every batter.  Pitchers have seven players playing behind them.  If you allow the player to hit the ball into play, chances are it’s going to find someone.

Rule number 7:  Put the ball into play with a runner on 3^rd with less than two outs.  There’s an old style swing called “butcher block” swing.   What this is – is the batter swings down as if taking a cleaver to a slab of beef.  The whole point is to just put the ball into play.  With the downward motion – it should be easier to get the bat on the ball and it’s like a bunt except it’s more unpredictable.  This is a skill that was used for years and I don’t see it any more.

Rule number 8:  EVERYONE bunts.  And I mean EVERYONE.

Rule number 9:  Think outside the box.  There was a time when the Mariners faced a Red Sox pitcher who OWNED them (can’t remember the name).  He was something like 12-1 against the Mariners.  If you know this guy owns you and that the chances of getting a win are slim...I would start the game as I normally would and see if he’s on his game.  If he is...I’d change it up.  Have all your batters to bunt – force the pitcher off the mound.  If you get men on base and you’re losing badly, steal bases.  Just go crazy.  It’s one game out of a162.

I fully understand that one of the beauties of Baseball is that it is a game that has hardly changed in 150 years.  That’s great.  But that doesn’t mean you have to continue to do the same damn thing you’ve been doing for 150 and expect different results.

Matt Terry's 101 Rules for Hollywood

MATT TERRY’S 101 RULES FOR SCREENWRITING AND HOLLYWOOD

Recently I’ve read, or heard, the quote that “Hollywood has no rules – but you break them at your peril.”  I’ve rattled that around in my head and I’ve come up with my “Rules for Screenwriting and Hollywood” – maybe you have more...

(Please note:  these are in no particular order.)

1.      There are no over-night successes.

2.      “No one in Hollywood knows anything.” – William Goldman

3.      The villain must die a horrible painful death.

4.      Your hero must be active and push the story along.

5.      The audience must care about your hero or, at the very least, find them interesting.

6.      Create interesting characters that actors will want to play.

7.      Write what YOU want to write, don’t write what someone thinks you should write or what you think is hot now because it won’t be hot when you’re done.

8.      Don’t pigeon-hole yourself as a “comedy” writer or a “genre” writer if you have different stories to write (but note that if you get a manager or agent it will be harder for them to sell you) – When Tina Fey was hot after writing “Mean Girls” I mentioned to my manager that I had a “teen sex comedy” I was working on and she promptly said:  “Oh, no, Tina Fey is the teenage screenwriter at this time.”

9.      Act like you belong, but don’t act cocky.

10.  Humble yourself – but don’t be a wussy.

11.  Producer Tony Bill has a wonderful quote:  “If a great screenplay is tossed out a window on I-5 it will get found and it will get made.”  As much as I love that quote, the only problem is that every screenwriter from here to Mozambique thinks they’ve written a great screenplay.

12.  No matter how perfect your screenplay is...it can be improved.

13.  Feedback without anything to help you be a better writer is nothing.  “The script is fantastic!” or “The script is terrible!” with nothing to back it up are equal in uselessness.  After a friend watched my film he told me that the “acting was terrible, the directing was terrible and the writing was terrible” but then wanted to see my next film.  Why on God’s earth would he want to?

14.  Research is not writing.

15.  Hollywood deals in product, not art.  Art sometimes transcends the product.

16.  You are responsible for getting your script written – you can’t blame your job, your spouse, your kids, your schedule.  If it’s important to you – you’ll write it.

17.  Even if your script is fantastic, it must be in the proper format or no one will read it.

18.  85 – 100 pages for a comedy.

19.  90 – 110 pages for a drama.

20.  I have no idea what Hollywood will buy.  Hollywood has no idea what Hollywood will buy. (I have a friend who wrote a great script about the first NFL Female QB.  Many other writers have told her it’s too unbelievable.  Remember, Hollywood has made films about field goal kicking donkeys, dogs that play basketball and monkeys that play baseball.)

21.  Scripts are like movies – which means that someone may love it while someone may hate it.

22.  Make the movie.

23.  Write the script.

24.  If you have the experience, mentor or teach.

25.  Don’t take things personally and move on.  I recently contacted a director who teaches for USC Film School.  He directed one of my favorite movies.  He e-mailed me and we talked about my son.  He was open for more conversations and I thought that this was a great start to help my son possibly get into USC Film School.  I wrote him back to continue the conversation.  Never heard from him again.  Oh well.

26.  Don’t hold grudges.

27.  It’s not what you know – it’s who you know.

28.  No one you know is going to stick their neck out for you if you can’t deliver.

29.  Be persistent but don’t be annoying.

30.  Act professional.  Remember that whoever chooses to work with you – they’re taking you on as someone they’re potentially going to work closely with for 6 months, 12 months, 18 months.  They want that experience to be enjoyable...so do you.

31.  You’re probably not going to be paid what you think you’re worth.  My first option was for $10 and the check bounced.

32.  If you can, be open to help others when they ask for it, but don’t take on so much it keeps you from doing what you need to be doing to be creative.

33.  If you have the time, volunteer.

34.  Losing your screenwriting virginity is an accomplishment that should be well rewarded.  You’ve just accomplished something that many people say they want to do...but don’t.  Same with directing your own film.  Same with producing a film.

35.  Be wary of “experts” who want to charge you $$$ for their access.  There are no shortcuts (see rule #1).

36.  Your agent or manager has more clients than just you...hopefully.

37.  Patience is a virtue – but that shouldn’t stop you from continuing to write.

38.  Understand how films are made...ALL aspects of film.  From cinematography, lighting, editing, etc.  Feel free to analyze film.  Ask yourself while you’re watching it:  “How did they get that shot?  How did they light that scene?  Where did they set up the camera?”

39.  You will never sell that script if it’s in a box or on your computer hard drive, you will eventually have to let someone read it.

40.  Despite your fears – 99.5% of the people in Hollywood are not out to steal your “brilliant” idea.

41.  Learn how to pitch.  Standard pitch and elevator pitch.

42.  Don’t pitch a script you haven’t written.

43.  Sometimes it’s luck.  Sometimes it’s timing.  Sometimes it’s skill.  Sometimes...

44.  Reading screenplays is not writing (though it can be helpful).

45.  Understand the difference between a “Spec” script and a “Production” script.

46.  If possible, spend time on a film set – micro budget, middle budget, big budget – doesn’t matter.  Observe the creative process.

47.  Respect where film came from.  A local film teacher had a student (in his 40’s!) walk out of “Citizen Kane” because he thought it was “boring.”

48.  Everyone knows who Chaplin and Keaton were.  Now get to know Pickford, Fairbanks and Lloyd.  During their day – they were more popular than Chaplin and Keaton combined.

49.  A good film cannot be made with a bad script.  A bad film can be made with a good script.

50.  Everyone is a critic.

51.  The subtext is what your script is REALLY about.

52.  Know who these people are:  Ford, Hitchcock, Sturges, Capra, Wilder, Truffaut, Kramer, Jewison, Lumet and Kubrick – better yet, watch some of their films

53.  All writing is re-writing.  Know that the first draft is going to suck...that’s okay.

54.  Continue to learn, progress, move forward.

55.  “You’ll never make/write/achieve/direct/produce it.” is not a statement, it’s a challenge.  Don’t listen to the naysayers.

56.  Write scripts you want to see on the big screen.

57.  Surfing the internet is not writing.

58.  Foreshadowing in a screenplay is your friend.

59.  Never underestimate the power of second act characters (Han Solo is a 2^nd Act Character)

60.  Create a writing routine.

61.  Be nice.

62.  Don’t be jealous of a friend’s success.  Their success is YOUR success because you helped them....and they may help you in the future.

63.  There are idiots in Hollywood – there are also idiots in your current job.

64.  Never pass up an opportunity to get that shot.  My son and I were able to get a couple shots for his film that would have cost a studio over $50K to create.  We got them for free.

65.  Reading books on film or screenwriting is not writing.

66.  Don’t make excuses and own up to your mistakes.  You’ll make a lot of them.

67.  Dream big, but understand that dreaming is not writing/directing/producing.

68.  Show character – use visuals.  Avoid “Dick and Janing” your script.  (But don’t go crazy.)

69.  Keep in contact.  A producer I worked with when I first started writing asked me to help him with his website years later which opened doors to interviewing producers and writers.

70.  Being a member of a writers group is not writing.

71.  Don’t let someone else’s success stop you from succeeding – don’t compare.  You have your own story to tell.  I interviewed a Seattle based screenwriter who seemed to travel the same path as I, but he had sold a screenplay that would eventually turn into a $100,000,000 grossing picture.  He sold his first script for $175,000.  He would eventually have his name on a TV series.  I found myself very jealous of him and I realized it was because he was “real.”  Charlie Kaufman, Shane Black, William Goldman, Quentin Tarantino?  They’re as real to me as Spider-man – never met them, who knows if I ever will.  But this guy was just like me...but he had success and I didn’t.  I then realized that if he can make it...so can I and turned my jealousy into a challenge.

72.  Thinking about writing is not writing.

73.  If possible, create a think-tank of friends who are willing to give you their honest opinions about your script and are open to conversations about it.  Always remember that it’s about making the script better and making you a better writer.  But the burden of the story always lies with you.  And always reciprocate.

74.  Thank people.

75.  The script is the most important thing about the film...until it’s not.

76.  You will be re-written...learn to deal with that fact.

77.  It may not seem like much, but .2 for every dollar spent on the film is quite a bit of money.  The first contract I wrote, I would get $100,000 if the film production cost was $10,000,000 or over.  That’s 1%.  As insulting as that sounds I would have been ecstatic to have it.

78.  It’s not always about the money.

79.  Take risks in what you write, don’t care what your spouse, parents, priest, best friend, co-workers think (unless they can sue you).

80.  Lose the “lotto mentality” that all you have to do is sell this one script and all your dreams will come true (and all your bills will be paid and people will love you and...).

81.  Sell your script – don’t sell your soul.

82.  Posting status updates is not writing.

83.  If possible write every day, or do SOMETHING every day that moves you towards your ultimate goal.

84.  You will fail...it’s okay.

85.  Take time to look at what you’ve accomplished.  A friend of mine who has had multiple shorts made of her scripts, has had options, been paid thousands of dollars over the years, is highly respected – still gets depressed because she hasn’t made the big sell yet.

86.  As attractive as you are, no one sleeps with the screenwriter to get to the top.

87.  Learn to communicate face to face.

88.  There are only three common stories:  “Boy Meets Girl,” “Fish Out of Water” and “Incredible Journey or Adventure.”  All other stories come out of these three (or a combination of these three).

89.  Texting is not writing.

90.  Treat people with respect.  Everyone.  From the janitor to the studio head.  Even better, get to know their names.

91.  You can live outside of Hollywood and make a living at screenwriting, just know that the journey is going to be longer and more difficult.

92.  Film festivals are great places to meet people – better yet, volunteer.  Went to a film festival a couple years ago, realized as I was heading to my car I was walking behind the director, the producers and one of the actors of the film I had just seen.  Got a chance to talk to them.  Also met Edward Zwick before “Glory” and “The Last Samurai.”

93.  Understand the role of “readers” in this process and how scripts get read and moved along the Hollywood food chain.

94.  One page = one minute of screen time.

95.  Encourage others to accomplish their dreams.

96.  Be careful what you wish for...because you just might get it.

97.  Understand the foreign film markets and how they impact Hollywood.

98.  Don’t cut corners, don’t think there’s an “easier way,” do the work.

99.  Focus

      100.  Roger Corman is probably the most influential director/writer/producer in Hollywood 

         for the last 50 years.  He’s still alive.  And if you don’t know who he is...you should

         learn.  Now.

101.  Writing silly lists is not writing.